Starting over....Again.

So I’m kick starting my weight loss journey for the 13268574986462464th time this week. And for probably the 45321654th time in 2015. 

I've had some eye opening experiences in the past few months. Idk if I ever posed here that i was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes back in August. I’ve since lost over 20 lbs but have been unable to really kick myself into gear. I started a job doing registration in the Emergency Department of one of the major Hospitals here in central IL.  I can’t tell you how many diabetes/obesity related patients I’ve seen come through that ER since i started in mid December. I’ve had myself “scared straight” several times in that time. I’m really trying to get myself in the mindset once and for all to just do this and quit having to start over. 

I recently purchased the new Nutribullet 900 series and have incorporated a daily smoothie into my world. Now i’m going to add to this. I've signed up for a service here in my home town that is ran by a nutritionist/personal trainer where her staff cooks up fresh heart healthy/diabetic friendly meals and delivers them to you. I've signed up for the 5 day lunch and dinner pack where i will have lunches and dinners for 5 days a week cooked up for me. The beauty is that they deliver twice a week, so you aren't getting all 5-7 days at once- so its always pretty fresh. i will be picking up my orders as its right near me and it will save me 10 bucks a week on the delivery fee. I’m pretty excited about it.

I've also started walking a few times a week I’m going to be upping this to 4-6 days a week and eventually i will start incorporating strength training and some running into the week. I’m feeling pretty motivated right now. My biggest goal is to get back off of my diabetes and high BP and cholesterol meds. i don’t want to be on those for the rest of my life. I really also just want to feel better over all. These past few months I have felt like a giant sloth. I’m looking forward to the onset of extra energy i’m expecting from all the healthy eating and moving I’m going to be doing! I hope to keep up with this blog on a regular basis as i really suck at keeping up blogs and vlogs! 

Anyhoo….. Here we go again!! :) Hope everyone is doing well!

I'm looking down the juicing path...

This is taken from my Tumblr earlier today- As i still have no idea which one to keep posting to...

So I’ve been watching a ton of food and health related documentaries lately that have been really inspiring me. To name a few: “Vegucated”, “Hungry for Change”, and “Fat, Sick, & Nearly Dead”.
All of these are very educational when it comes to the benefits of a clean diet and all of the crap that is in the processed foods that we eat every day.
“Fat, Sick, & Nearly Dead” has me extremely interested in Juicing. In fact, one of my roommates and I are going to embark on the Juicing path. We are going to go halfsies on a Ninja brand Blender/Juicer/food processor that we found at Target for $100 and we are going to start experimenting with different fruits and veggies.
Eventually my goal is to do a 60 day Juicing cleanse. I found a guy online with a blog that follows him on the last year where he started with a 60 juice fast and over the past year has lost 100 lbs. He has lots of helpful hints on getting through it and how he slowly broke his fast. Lots of tips for shopping and recipes as well. His fast is a little different -in that he would do 2 juices a day and a salad for the 3rd meal.. and he would allow himself to snack on fruits and veggies… so its not a straight up Juice Fast. But i like this idea. He also used a BlendTek Blender instead of a Juicer as it used a lot less produce and was a little more affordable.
http://livingontheoutsideaisle.wordpress.com/

I’m also loving the site for Joe Cross:  http://www.rebootwithjoe.com/
It’s a community of Juicers who share progress and Recipes. I have yet to join. But once I start juicing I plan to join. there are TONS of Juice and Smoothie Recipes on here.

Also- I just found this website: http://juicerecipes.com/recipes/
with tons of recipes and the benefits of each individual recipe. I’m getting pretty excited about doing this. I think it will be a fantastic jump start to lose weight and clean out my system. From what I’ve been reading- shortly into the fast you stop craving all the junk because your system is so used to all the healthy goodness you are feeding it.
Since post on March 4th, where I weighed in at 286.0, I have bounced around from 265-nearly 268. Ridiculous. However this past few days I have been doing MUCH better with my food choices and cravings. I think these Documentaries have been brainwashing me! LOL Not that I’m complaining!

Feeling envious and frustrated with myself.

Unsure which Blog to use- so I'm posting here and Tumblr... both of which need updated profiles badly. LOL

I thought It was time for a real blog entry. I am about to RE-embark on my weight loss journey for the 987435862348723647th time.  I have a LOT of people around me that are succeeding in their own weight loss journeys and they all look amazing! It’s giving me the motivation to get back on the horse. Again.
I wish I knew what power food holds over me. I wake up almost every day with the intent of eating healthier. Not having fast food. Or soda. Or junk. But whenever the time comes, it’s like i go into this zombie state and forget all about the fact that this food I’m about to consume is sending me in the complete OPPOSITE direction that I want to be going in. I completely rationalize why its ok for me to eat this “this time” - EVERY time. I sit down at night here on tumblr and see all the awesome “fitspo” and before and after pics and alllll the awesome motivation and I’m totally pumped. But then…. go to work and by break time I’m starving and “HAVE TO HAVE a Dr. Pepper” and then I have a huge ass soda….and then I get off of work and I’m starving again and we (My roommates and i) go out to eat and I consistently make the worst choices possible. Its stupid.
Tomorrow is Monday, March 4th. I’m going to going grocery shopping after work tomorrow where I will purchase food for every meal and make it so that I can not go out to eat because the food I bought will go bad and there for be a total waste of money. I will even buy myself one of those  packs of mini Dr Pepper cans so that I can start weening myself away from dr pepper. Instead of having a 32 oz fountain DP, I will have the 8 oz can. I will also start counting the oz’s of water I will be consuming and make sure that I get as much in as I can during the day. It’s definitely time to stop being stupid. It’s time to see how amazing being healthy feels.
I will also be restarting my Couch to 5k program because its been over 2 weeks no since i’ve gone out for a run. I LOVE the way running makes me feel. I am going to get thru the 8 weeks! I will also start lifting 2 or 3 days a week.  It’s time. I’m 33 years old. It’s only going to get harder from here. I want to feel good. I want to enjoy shopping for clothes. I want to have an awesome after to my billion before pictures. I want to be able to go home for visits and shock people from my old life with my new look. I want to live to be an old woman who is healthy, without the heart disease, cancers, and diabetes that run crazy through my family.
It’s time.
The Plan: Weigh myself EVERY DAY in March***I know that weighing myself isn’t the best plan. But its MY best plan. It will keep me on track and keep me motivated to stay there.*** To only allow myself to eat out on the weekend -once or twice- NOT EVERY MEAL.  Drink 64 plus ounces of water per day. Eat every meal. NO 32 oz fountain soda (eventually no more soda at all). Snack on fruits and veggies. and BLOG. and Read Blogs and watch Vlogs. KEEP MOTIVATED!

It’s a start. I’ve a long way to go. I will post the official re-starting weight and picture tomorrow.

Long time, no blog.

I can't believe it's going on 6 months since I graduated from school and since my last blog entry!

Not a whole lot has changed since then. I did become nationally certified for massage therapy back on Aug. 12th which is when I took and passed the NCE. :) So that's good stuff.

I'm still working on getting my stuff all together for state certification. I'm hoping to have it all sent off by the end of the month and have my license number soon after so that I can start working!

As for the weight loss game... I'm sitting at 276 lbs today. I am done messing around. I've gained back pretty much everything I last last year..well i guess almost 2 now.. Its ridiculous and I'm fed up/disgusted with myself.
There are 12 weeks left in 2011. I have a goal of losing at least 35 lbs in that time. I KNOW i can do this if i keep my head in the game. Which means no more eating out for lunch and no more 32 oz cups of  Dr Pepper and candy on my lunch break as well. I'm making it a clear point to plan every meal and drink at least 96 oz of water every day. These steps alone will make a HUGE difference over the next 12 weeks.
I'm also going to be working on getting my but moving. I'm going to work my way back into going to the gym 5 nights a week by the time winter hits. I will start with walking 3 nights a week around the neighbor hood and get myself to the gym twice a week for lifting. It's what needs to be done.

So I'm just going to do it. I'm weighing in every Monday right now for a 10 week weight loss 'battle' of which I'm on week 3 and I've made ZERO progress right now. I WILL make the most of the next 7 weeks of that competition and get a majority of that 35 lbs in the next  7 weeks. I think I'm going to start stepping on the scale every day again. That's what I was doing back when i was losing weight like crazy.

Well that's it for now. I'm going to try and start posting something semi daily from now on. maybe that will help keep me on track as well.

Wish me luck.
<3

First the good news and excitement!

Friday April 29th, 2011 was the big day!
After 20 months of hard work and dedication- I graduated Massage Therapy School!!  I'm now officially a Massage Therapist. It will be an amazing feeling to be able to answer the question "What do you do?" with an actual title: "I'm a Massage Therapist"....instead of saying "well I work at a daycare center.... or I work in a grocery store.. etc. I have a title! I'm extremely proud of that.  Soon I can say "I'm a Licensed Massage Therapist" (Technically I will be a "Nationally Certified, State Licensed Massage Therapist" LOL I'm excited that I will have the letters "LMT" behind my name from now one! I'll be "Keri Roberts LMT!

SO EXCITING!! Now that I've graduated I have this weird excited/nervous feeling in my stomach. I will be spending the next month or so preparing to take NCE (national certification exam)and I think once i get that taken, the nervousness will lessen a bit. I'm definitely nervous about that!!  Having to re study all the bones and muscles are what are going to kill me! LOL I learned them and got A's on all my tests- but i feel like I didn't really retain any of it! It scares me! But I will study my ass off for the next month or more!

I'm going to miss all of my class mates like crazy. They've all been such a big part of my life for the last 20 months and I've seen them all at least 2 days a week, its going to be so weird not seeing them every week! Thank god for Facebook. I have all of them but one(who doesn't have a fb lol) on there so i can stay in touch.

GO ME! <3


I guess I'll update on the weight loss front. I had one amazing week on that cleanse where I lost over 6 and a half lbs... But then the weekend hit and i started missing pills and days.... so of course I ended up falling off the wagon... Once again.  UGH. So annoying.
I have another 2 week supply. So I'm gonna hit it again. I'm going to do the full 2 weeks and get my crap back on track.
That's all I'm going to say about that.

I have had another revelation that has been in the making for a while now, but I think It's starting to come into fruition. I've decided that I am going to stop waiting until I'm "Thin" to start enjoying my life. I'm so sick of being so critical of myself because I'm not at a perfect weight. I have so much more to offer. I am at a great place in life. I'm getting ready to embark on an amazing journey with this new career of mine. I deserve to be proud of this.
And I AM! Everything is always over shadowed by the fact that I still don't look the way i want to look. I'm not going to let this. I felt so good all day friday. I felt like I looked amazing when I left the house and I felt good all day. Then I saw the pictures and I instantly felt like crap about them. It's not fair to do that to myself.
I refuse to do this anymore.  So- over the next couple of weeks or months, I am going to be working on #'s 1, 9, 10,56, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 81,92, 93, & 96 of my Zero Day Project list.

Now that I've read through this list again- i see proof that this idea has been in the works for a while. I am going back to my positive thinking and the secret. eff this being miserable over one small part of who I am.

"99% of who and what you are is invisible and untouchable."

Anyhoo... yeah. That's whats going on in my neck of the woods.

I'll be back again soon with more positive words about my life!
LIFE IS GOOD!

Day 2 of the cleanse

It's Monday night. I started the cleanse on Sunday morning- so I've had 2 full days on it. I have to say I've been doing really well.

In case you are curious as to which cleanse I am doing- and You haven't seen my last video- Here is a link to it.

http://www.renewlife.com/organic-total-body-cleanse.html

The only side affect so far has been a headache... I've had it off and on since yesterday afternoon. That may be my lack of soda too. I've been addicted to Dr Pepper for months now and I haven't had any since Friday...LOL So that could be whats causing the headaches. Other than that I haven't really had any major issues with it. I have a feeling that either tomorrow or Wednesday I may be singing a whole different tune...According to anyone i've talked to about doing a cleanse - day 3 and 4 are not fun. We'll see.
I dunno if this is in my head or not- but feel lighter today. It's probably because I've been eating REAL and HEALTHY food for 2 full days now. No fast food. 32 oz Dr Peppers.... It's amazing what difference 2 days of healthy eating makes.
I fully plan on sticking this 14 days through. This cleans wasn't cheap. (for me anyway....lol) and i want to not only get my money's worth- but I want to have a nice jump off for the rest of the weight loss journey!

I've been drinking a TON of water. And I've been Peeing like a champ. LOL
Well that's my check in on the cleanse!
I will try and check in again tomorrow evening!

So far- So good! <3

I've also been siting in my room since about 8:00 cleaning my room... and by "cleaning my room"- i really mean tinkering around and doing anything and everything but cleaning it. LOL I have gotten all the laundry sorted and put away-- so I have a floor again... Tomorrow nights goal is organize the top of the dresser and every other surface in the room because for some reason i tend to just throw my stuff on top of the first surface I find with no real regard to where it actually goes. LOL My room is a cluttered disaster area most of the time.
I blame this on the fact that i have no closet and its such a small room that Ihave nowhere to really put anything...and I own entirely too much crap.
One of these days I am going to go through everything and start getting rid of it. I kind of want to start purging 99% of my belongings and clothing in order to make room for my new life once I start my new career and actually get this weight off once and for all.
anhyhoo... that's enough of my blabbering..
Hope everyone's having a great week so far!
I'll check in again soon!
<3

So- about my last post...

Starting the cleanse didn't happen. It's going to happen on Monday.
Don't ask.
I'm planning on grocery shopping this weekend for some lower calorie and fat choices for meals this week so that I can get the most out of this cleanse. I thought about fasting for a day or 2 out of the 14- I read somewhere that it would help get even greater results. Anyone have any opinions to the contrary?

I can feel myself starting to get motivated again. I just feel disgusting. Like a total sloth. I am going to start the Couch to 5k program either over the weekend or on Monday. I need to sit down and work out the schedule with my work and school schedule. I would also like to start strength training a couple of days a week again. I'm letting my gym membership lapse at the end of the contract (which is at the end of may) because I'm probably going to be moving and I'm not quite sure where to yet- so I don't want to have to deal with breaking a contract when that happens. I think I'm going to start doing the Kettle-bell at home when that happens. I"ll just have to invest in a new DVD and probably a heavier bell.

I graduate 3 weeks from tomorrow and I am no where NEAR where I wanted to be by now. But whatevs. No point in dwelling on that. I am a completely different person mentally and emotionally than i was when I started school so I'm not as devastated by this as I thought I might be. I'm really learning to appreciate myself exactly as I am which is HUGE for me. Don't get me wrong... i still HATE being fat and could never embrace that "Big Beautiful Woman" mentality... lol I've never been able to get next to that... but I've figured out that there is a WHOLE Lot more to me than just the size of my body.

"99% of who and what you are is invisible and untouchable."

I learned this on The Secret. That quote hit me like someone chucked a sack full of bricks at my head. I've lived for so many years letting my weight and appearance tell me I wasn't worthy. So Stupid.

Anyway- I've gone of topic.... It's time to get my head in the game.  I'm not going to make any numerical goals this time. I'm just going to start living healthier and let the weight come off as it may. And keep it coming off instead of the other direction. I want to be more active. I want to be a runner. I just want to be healthy. I don't have to get down to 120 lbs or anything. Just at a healthy weight where I am comfortable in my clothes.
That's it.

Alright. It's way past my bed time. I'm exhausted. So I hope this post wasn't too all over the place and it made some kind of sense!

I'll check back soon.

<3